So, I am finally getting up the courage to write some of the things that I really think about and hope that I don't offend anyone. It's not my intent. I don't really think any "offenders" read my blog so I welcome opinions.
Why do people take gifts and acts of service for granted? Birthday, Christmas, Anniversary, etc. I notice it most, however, with wedding gifts. So here's my pet peeve:
Target, Bed, Bath & Beyond, Wal-Mart and other big stores now have these little inserts that say "The Bride and Groom are registered at..." and are intended to be placed in with the wedding invitations. Now, my kids know that I hate these things (and I know there will probably be some in Em's invitation...but it's not my idea). (If everyone who inserted them in their invites were to write thank you's it wouldn't seem so obnoxious--in the 'olden days' we still registered, it was just up to the gift giver to figure out where). Anyway, while it can be helpful to know where the bride and groom are registered, it strikes me as a request for gifts. Having read up on the subject, proper etiquette dictates that when I receive a wedding invitation that I send a gift. Ok. I can do that. Proper etiquette, however, also dictates that the bride and groom send a note of thanks. Why?
1) Basically, it's rude not to!
2) Since they basically requested gifts when they put little inserts in their invitations it would be appropriate if they said "thank you" for them.
3) The person giving the gift had to go out of their way, drive to Target (or wherever), print out the gift list, maneuver their way around the aisles looking for something (affordable) on the list (that never seems to be there), find an appropriate card, purchase the gift and the card (and perhaps gift wrap and bow), go home, wrap the gift, write in the card and then attend the reception. Reception time: 2 hours. Finding the gift and wrapping it: 1-2 hours. Paying for the gift $25 +... (depending on the recipient--I know, I'm cheap) and the $3.00 card and the $4.00 gift wrap... and the time that went into preparing it... That's a lot of time on the part of the giver.
4) If the person giving the gift mails it, unless a note of thanks is sent, the sender may not know if it was received. Alas, I always know when my checks are cashed though...which brings me to
5) I now just generally give a check. May seem impersonal but it's easy and I know when they've received it cuz my bank lets me know on my statement. ;)
Recently I have heard from a relative and a woman in my ward that they "just never had the time" to write notes of thanks for their wedding gifts and their baby shower gifts. Well, my relative has children who are now in their 20's. I don't know what she's done in all those years but it seems to me that there's been some time that a few notes could have been jotted down. And the woman who said she hadn't written the baby shower thank you notes? I was grateful that I hadn't gotten her anything! (Wicked me) Maybe I'm wrong, but the five minutes it takes me to write a note, address it, stamp it and put it in the mail seems like a good response to someone's gift.
Please, please, please, if I've forgotten to say thank you for a gift to anyone who reads this, MY APOLOGIES...it's certainly not because I didn't have time. I think it means I need a big swift kick in the pants and that I should delete this post!
Not that this should be an influence in why one writes thank you notes but I received a mighty fine inheritance because my grandpa appreciated the attention I gave to him. And, by the way, I had NO idea that he was going to remember me in his will after he died, so lest you think that I was attentive to him for that reason, you're wrong :) People appreciate being appreciated.
Once I helped a woman in our church by preparing a small presentation about something (?) for a mother and daughter. It was a very small, insignificant act. After I was done I didn't think any more about it. A day or so later I received a beautiful note of thanks telling me that I'd exceeded her expectations (ha! maybe they weren't very high... I never thought of that). Anyway, I was so pleased to receive that unexpected note in the mail that I still remember it eight years later!
I guess my point in all this is to say that I think many of us need to be more appreciative of each other. Myself included. The Lord certainly expects us to give thanks to Him for everything we have and everything we are, for the good and for the bad. I suspect that means we're also supposed to give thanks to each other. It's important to notice the good. I am very guilty of not being appreciative and I am particularly good at noticing the bad! Thus, I am going to work harder at noticing the good and attempting to ignore the bad. (But I just had to blog about it first! LOL)
Oh, before I ignore the bad I still plan to post about another pet peeve... TAILGATERS! And I don't mean the people that are hanging out at ball games. Why do people drive so close? Get off my tail !!!
This is a bow maker ;)
Tim demonstrating the bowmaker. It definitely works better with two people--one tying the bow and one to put their finger on the knot!
Bows and invitations. We aim to make approximately 250... yikes.
